Tuesday, June 28, 2011

( 18+ Jokes ) STRICTLY ADULTS : : Caution :: Language )


 

18+ ONLY

ALL TYPES OF NONVEG JOKES AND SHAIRI.
Its very funny and hot.

Pappu asking his Parrot: Mitthu, Jalebi khayega?Parrot: "apni ga#d me daal le bhos%i ke, Pahle Mirchi khila-khila k Bawaseer karwa di, ab Sugar bhi karwyega kya?"
Teacher- "Suraj ko diya dikhana"is muhavare ka arth batao..?Student- " Iska matlab to waise hi hai jaise........"Bhalu ko La#de ke baal dikhana".


A Punjabi Bra Ad: Har kudi di pasand "GULABO BRA", Hun 6 size vich uplabdh,
1.Small,
2.Medium,
3.Vadde,
4.Oyee hoye, 5.Hay O Rabbaa,
6.O Teri Bhen Di.....


1 Kuwari Ladki ko Bachcha Hogaya.Uska Baap= ye kiska Hai ?LADKI= Papa miss call to Sab Hi Marte the..Pata Nahi Kiska Receive Ho gaya.


Girl: Surinder MADARC#OD..!Babaji: Aisa nahi bolte beti, aisa kyu bol rhe ho..?Girl: Usne meri chummi li..Babaji kissed & asked: Aise..?Girl: JiBabaji: Ispe madarc#od nahi kehte,Girl:Usne bra utar k mere b**bs chuse..Baba suckd b**bs & askd: Aise?Girl: JiBaba:Ye bhi koi badi wajah nhi haiGirl: Usne mujhe c#oda bhi.!Babaji f~ckd the grl & askd: Aise?Grl: HaaBaba: Ye bhi badi wajah nahi hai,Grl: Sx k baad usne mujhe bataya k use AIDS hai..!Babaji (jor se): Surinder MADARC#OD!




Jo log apni giflfriend ko chand samjate hai to.wo apni girlfriend ko chand samjana chhod de. kyuki chand par pehle hi teen log chad chuke hai aur usme Ek kutta bhi shamil tha.
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Mouse 2 elephant: 2 din k liye apni biwi ki BRA dena....Elephant: q? wife ko pehnayega kya?...mouse: nhi, beti ki shaadi me tent lagana hai Ladies/Gents alag-alag.
Beti- Maa baju wale ko dekhate hi mera bra tite ho jata hai.Maa- Beti bra mat pahna kar fir dekh uska Underwear Tite ho jayega.
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Santa was fondling a lady in a crowded bus.Lady: Excuse me, aap achha nahi kar rahe hain!Santa: Itni bheed me is se achha nahi ho sakta.
Which woman has the biggest vagina in the world?Sunni Deol's mother, b'coz Sunni himself said: "MAI NIKLA GADDI LEKE"
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Harbhajan to his wife: Darling ! kya main tera pahila pyar hoo ?Wife: Kardina sardar wali baat. Spinner ko kabhi opening milti hai kya?
Pappu sees his parents having SX.Pappu: Papa, kya kar rahe ho?Santa: Petrol bhar raha hoon.Pappu: Avg check karaao, abhi to Banta uncle dal kar gaye hain.
Santa ko susu karta dekh ladki rasta badal kar jaane lagi to Santa bola: O madam, ghabrao mat, tum jisse dar rahi ho usko maine pakad kar rakha hai...!
Jeeto: Oh zara dheere karo, kyon Shatabdi chala rahe ho, Maalgadi chalaao.Itne mein Pappu bed se gira aur bola jo marzi chalaao par sawaari ko to mat giraao.
Rocket & PlanePlane says: "yaar Rocket tum itni tez raftaar se kaise udh jate ho?"Rocket: "yeh to wohi jaane jis k ga#d main AAG lagi ho....
7 yrs boy k rape case me pakda jane par:Court me Lowyer(Boy ka Lu#d pakde hue): "ur honour is chhote se bachche ko dekho kya ye rape kar sakta hai?"Boy to lawyer: "Itna na hila, nahin to case haar jayenge!!"
Santa: Yaar meri biwi pani se bahut darti hai.Banta: Achaa, wo kaise?Santa: Kal mein jab ghar gaya to wo bath tub mai bhi security guard k saath baithi thi.
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Pair dabate hue saas ka ghaghra sarak gaya, Bahu ne PRANAM kiya. Saas boli: Are ye kya kar rahi hai?Bahu boli: Are Sasu G yahi to hai mere Pati ki Janm bhumi aur Sasur ki Karm bhumi hai.
"Pati- "aao SX kare
"Patni- "pehle Condom to lagao
"Pati- "Condom to pata nahi maine kaha rakh diya
"Patni- "ye roz ki bakarch*di se to achcha hai ki Lamination karwa lo"
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Ek bus mein ladko aur ladkiyo ki team antakshari khelne k liye bani-Girls: Hum tumko haraakar dikhayenge.....Boys: Hum haar gaye, chalo ab dikhao.
Santa: Mein tumhare liye churiyan laya hoon.
Maid: Aap hi pehna dijiye.
Santa: Mujhe tumhara response pehle pata hota to main panty lekar aata.
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Gabbar: Basanti tatti kar.
Viru: nahi Basanti in kutto ke samne tatti mat karna ye log tujhe paani nahi denge aur mujhse teri Ga#d chatwaaenge! !!
Lady: Bus mein cigarette pina mana hai, board nahi pada kya?Man: sali uske baju ka board pad lika hai " CONDOM ISTEMAL KARIYE" to kya Bus mein karu.
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Swami: hamesha apne se bade ko Maa, chhoti ko Beti aur barabar wali ko Bahan mano.
Sardar-lo baba ye lu#d aap rakh lo jari booti kootne k kaam aayega.
College me ek ladki k jeans ki zip khuli thi, toh ek ladka jaakar bola,"miss, apke tajmahal ka darwaza band kijiye,Yahan hamare qutub-minar hil rahe hai".
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man throws wife's bra out of the window at it falls on a mango seller.. he says: saale ne aam choos lia, aur chhilka mere uper phek diye.

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